Different
by YukueFumei
Summary: Tohru knew that Natsuno was different when they were still human, Natsuno even confirmed this. They meet again after both being raised from the dead, are they still different?


**I have been toying around with ****this story for way too long now, for a lot of reasons I didn't feel very satisfied with it. I was sort of depressed during the period I wrote this (one of the reasons I felt dissatisfied about it), so the story is kind of depressing too I guess.**

**Anyway, after two months I read it again and I thought: What the heck! Just upload it already, you stupid girl! So… here it is. Sorry that it took a while, but enjoy another Shiki fanfiction. **

**The last part of the story ("October 17th, Monday") is based on the conversation in manga chapter 23.**

**Disclaimer: ****I don't own Shiki.**

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The moment I first saw Natsuno I knew he was different. He was a kid from the city… an outsider… he knew about the world outside of this village! But, he also knew nothing of this village… of the way the villagers liked to gossip… how the villagers didn't like outsiders. The moment news of a family from the city moving to this small town got out, the village had been in uproar. The idea was ridiculous, there hadn't been one family the past fifty years that had moved in! No good things could come from a new family moving here, that is what most of the villagers thought.

Natsuno didn't belong here. Natsuno also knew he didn't belong here and gave off an aura that said not to approach him. Even though Natsuno was three years younger than me, something about him intrigued me. Before I knew it I had called out to him. That happened about a year ago.

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8th July, Saturday

"Yo, Tohru-chan!" Natsuno barged into my room.

"Oh.. Natsuno!" My eyes didn't leave the screen as I heard Natsuno pull out the box from underneath my bed, grabbing a magazine.

"Is that game really that interesting? Normally you would at least turn around, greeting me." Natsuno sat down beside, flipping through the magazine.

"Yeah.. it just arrived this afternoon. Ah man! Not again!" I gave a sigh as the words 'game over' appeared on the screen for the sixth time today. Natsuno just sat silently beside me, reading. Natsuno didn't really like talking. Sometimes we both sat in my room for hours not talking to each other at all, me playing a game and Natsuno reading. I noticed the magazine Natsuno was holding, the April issue of Jump Square. "Natsuno, I have the newest one if you want."

"This one's fine."

"Ah, I see…" I started the game once again. "You know, Aoi said she heard some rumor about you. Is it true that you are dating Shimizu?"

I got the magazine thrown at me for an answer.

"On second thought, I have already read this one." Natsuno didn't even answer the question.

"That hurt, you know."

"Then don't ask weird questions and you don't get things thrown at you." Natsuno answered as he was searching through the box again.

I laughed. "You really are strange Natsuno." I concentrated on the screen again. "I was just curious, you know. You've never really talked to me about things like that… Do you have anyone you like?"

"Not really," Natsuno answered as he opened another magazine and began reading.

"Are the girls here too plain for you? Because I can imagine girls in the city look hotter. They are a lot more fashionable, I think."

"Yeah.. they are." Natsuno didn't seem interested at all.

"Did you have a girlfriend in the city?" I looked at Natsuno from the corner of my eyes, eying his reaction. Looking away from the screen for a split second caused me to lose the game again. "Sh… again! I give up, this game is too hard! Hey, Natsuno are you listening?"

"Hmm… it's rare for you to give up." He didn't even look up from his magazine.

"That's not what I was talking about. Did you have a girlfriend?"

Natsuno seemed reluctant to answer. "No… never had one."

At that moment I noticed that his eyes weren't moving like they do when people are reading. He really was uncomfortable with this conversation. I decided it might be better to let the topic rest. "Do you want something to drink?"

"No, thanks. Say... Tohru-chan…?"

"What?"

"Don't you… think it's weird…? That I don't have interest in… you know… girls?" Natsuno was practically hiding behind the magazine, asking me that question.

"Not really, you're only fifteen. I guess some teenagers do things at their own pace."

"No, I didn't ask about that… I mean… I think I might… like guys." Natsuno was mumbling and I almost couldn't make out what he was saying. To tell the truth this confession shocked me a bit. I had never thought about things like that. In this village people didn't mention things like being gay or lesbian. It was almost a shame if you thought about things like that, let alone confess them! But, at the same time I felt happy… happy that Natsuno wanted to discuss this with me. By trusting me, it felt like he had finally truly accepted me as his best friend.

"Isn't that fine too?" I didn't really know how I should react, but the best thing I could think of was accepting him for what he was.

Natsuno lowered the magazine down a bit staring at me. I could see he was red in the face. "Do you really think so?"

"Yes, so… do your parents know?" I couldn't help but wonder at that.

Natsuno shook his head. "I didn't have the courage to tell them yet. But I'm fairly sure my mother knows… she sometimes keeps dropping hints at me that she would be fine with it and such. I don't know about my father though."

"Yeah, for some reason mothers always know. Like when I had a crush on a girl for the first time. I was certain that I was hiding it pretty well and I hadn't even talked to anyone about it, but she knew! With just one guess she also could say the girls name! I still wonder how she did that. Anyway, if you don't like girls, do you have a boy you like?" As I asked the question a sudden realization hit me, what if he liked me? I didn't like him, at least not in that way. But, if I had to turn him down, it would certainly damage our friendship!

"No one in particular, I just noticed that I tend to prefer looking at guys instead of girls." Natsuno answered as he observed me struggling with my inner self. "Rest assured, I'm not in love with you. You're too much of a nice guy, you're obsessed with games, you snore, you can't drive safely, you sometimes act like a coward and you read crappy magazines."

I was relieved, this wasn't going to change our friendship. We could still joke around. "Anything else you don't like about me? Also, if you don't like that magazine, give it back."

Natsuno threw the magazine at my smiling face, laughing too. He must have been relieved that he could finally share this secret with someone.

"Thanks, Tohru-chan. For not saying weird things about it."

"Isn't that what friends are for?"

"Um.. I guess so."

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October 17th, Monday

I still remember that day. Even though memories of my human life are kind of vague, I can remember that day clearly. It had been the day that confirmed Natsuno really was different, but none of that mattered anymore. Natsuno had raised from the dead, he was sitting in the tree right above me! I couldn't believe my eyes as they were probably playing tricks on me. Natsuno was no longer different, he was one of us now. A Shiki… a monster craving for blood… a murderer…

"Natsuno," My voice was barely audible as I forgot to breath.

Natsuno jumped out of the tree, making a perfect landing, almost as silently as a cat.

"Natsuno!" Even though the distance was small, I started running toward him. I wanted to touch him, to make sure I wasn't hallucinating… I wanted to make sure he really was standing there. But before I could reach Natsuno, he gestured for me not to come any closer.

"I have no intention of forgiving the risen. Even you Tohru-chan, after all you are the one who killed me!"

His accusation hurt… It was true that I had killed him. I could have forced myself to stop attacking him, to let him recover! Instead I had been selfish, stilling my hunger by taking his blood. "It's true, but what should I do then? What should I do…?"

"Just tell me," Natsuno answered, looking straight at me. I knew what he wanted, he didn't even need to explain. Natsuno wanted me to betray the other Shiki by giving him crucial information and he was confident I would tell him. I admired him, even though he was caught in this kind of situation he was still thinking of strategic plans. Natsuno had made the right choice by asking me, if it meant restoring our friendship, I wouldn't hesitate even a second to sell out the other Shiki.

"Tell me about the revived. What do Tatsumi and the others plan to do? Whatever they plan to stir up in the village, tell me." Natsuno continued, he really was determined to put an end to what was happening in this village. I nodded as I decided at that moment, I would fight beside him. I had been ignoring the situation for way too long now, already too many villagers had been killed. I just had been too scared to do something about it.

Natsuno leaned against a tree, observing me. "What is Tatsumi exactly? He can survive in daylight, as I've seen him walking around a few times."

"Tatsumi and Yoshie are kind of special. I don't know the details, but unlike us Shiki they still have a pulse and they can be out in sunlight. Sunako calls them werewolves, if I remember correctly."

"I see. Can you eat normal food? "

I looked at him in confusion, not following the direction of his story. "No, Shiki can drink things like coffee or sake, but can't eat. Natsuno, it must have been days since you revived, I figured you already knew this! What did you do about food?" Shocked I put a hand on my mouth, I hadn't meant to ask that question.

"What about werewolves, can they eat?" Natsuno ignored my question, not even looking at me now.

"I'm not sure, I have never seen them eat. But I do know that they drink blood. Why do you want to know this?"

"I'm one of those werewolves." Natsuno said this like it was nothing special, like he was telling me about what kind of weather it would be tomorrow.

My eyes widened at him. "No way… impossible!" For some reason I really wanted him to be mistaken about this. "Werewolves are very rare, only three or four exist in whole Japan! And on top of that three werewolves existing in the same region, let alone the same town! I can't believe it…"

"Then don't believe it, but I refuse to attack humans as I don't need their blood to survive. I won't lower myself to the same level as you've sunk already."

With those words Natsuno turned around, leaving me standing in the woods. I stared after him, feeling angry. "It's not like I had a choice," I muttered more to myself than to Natsuno. Suddenly I felt the urge to scream at him, Natsuno didn't understand a thing! "I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE! I HAVE TO KILL IN ORDER TO STAY ALIVE! I NEVER WISHED FOR THIS KIND OF LIFE!" My voice echoed through the mountains, but I felt relieved. I thought I was finally the same as Natsuno. The same being, the same creature, the same monster. But, Natsuno wouldn't need to become a murderer. Natsuno could survive without killing people. I couldn't help but envy him… Even in this life Natsuno was different.

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**Please review =)**

**Ps: I hope to upload another Shiki fanfic soon.**


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